Week 8 - Introduction: Faith that Repents

Wisdom for a Blue Jean Faith (Week 8 Memory Verse)

“'God opposes the proud, but he gives grace to the humble.’ So submit to God. But resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and he will draw near to you.”
James 4:6b-8a (NET)

My family includes a number of graduates of Texas A&M University; my father, my daughter, my son, a brother-in-law, and a nephew and his wife all went to school there. Those of you from Texas probably know first-hand of the fierce loyalty that A&M elicits from its students and graduates. Being the child of an Aggie, I grew up singing the fight song and pulling for the then-always-losing football team. My Aggie loyalty is fierce, although I never went to school there.

As I wrote this in December 2006, we were looking forward to watching the Aggie football team play Cal in a bowl game. My daughter received her MBA from Cal so we wondered where her loyalties would lie in the game, but her allegiance to A&M was too overwhelming. When she had to make a choice, she had to choose the Aggies!

God calls us to total loyalty and complete allegiance to Him. We should look a bit like the Aggie fans—unquestionably loyal! No other love should compete with that love to God!

How To Use This Study Guide (Review)

Weekly:

Wisdom for a Blue Jean Faith —Each week you will have a verse to memorize that brings out an essential lesson or thought from the week’s study. Begin learning it the first day, hiding God’s Word in your heart.

Personal Stories —Each lesson includes a true story that relates the truths of the week’s lesson to a woman’s real life experience. Some of the names have been changed to protect the guilty! These stories will encourage you in your walk with God and your growth in godliness.

Specific types of questions included in each day’s work:

1. Sharing Questions are designed for you to write stories, insights, and applications from your own life. You will never be forced to share one of these answers aloud (post a comment) with your group, but growing in community with one another requires us to be open and vulnerable so volunteer to share.

2. Responding to God Questions are reminders that we study God’s Word so that He can speak to us and we are changed thereby. We should be listening for His voice. These types of questions ask for a response to God’s personal message to you. I have found that writing out my prayers helps me to focus better on what I need to say to God. No one will ask you to read (post) yours, but you should always feel free to share your response with your group.

3. Stronger Jeans are optional questions designed for those who want to dig deeper. Some of the answers will be easy for even a beginning Bible student, and some will require more experience in God’s Word.
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Week 1: Faith for Hard Times
Week 2: Faith that Leans on God
Week 3: Faith that Fixes What's in the Mirror
Week 4: Faith that Doesn't Play Favorites
Week 5: Faith that is Alive
Week 6: Faith that Ties the Tongue
Week 7: Faith that Brings Peace
Week 8: Faith that Repents
Week 9: Faith that Looks to Jesus' Coming
Week 10: Faith that Prays

Week 8 - Day 1

Review James 4:1-3, and read James 4:4-10.

1. James’ tone here is very harsh. Contrast the term he uses to address his audience here with those you find as you scan the book. Look again at the message of 4:4-10. Why may he use harsh terminology here?

We read 4:4 literally and wonder if there is a lot of adultery going on in the churches to which James writes, but the rest of the verse helps us see that this is spiritual adultery rather than physical adultery.

2. Look up the following verses to help you understand the biblical background for the use of this term in a spiritual sense. Write down your insights.
a. Isa. 54:5-6—addressed to Israel
b. Jer. 3:20
c. Mt. 12:38-39

What does it mean to be the “world’s friend” (4:4)? Keddie has a great explanation:

“Friendship with the world,” then, is when these inner desires and motives are in harmony with those of the world that does not know and does not want to know God. It is when we seek what the world seeks, when we want the riches that fade away, when we hunger for the praise of men that God says is a snare, when we much prefer the pleasures of ‘the old man with his affections and lusts’ to the righteousness of Christ—it is then that we know we are friends with the world and would rather not be distracted or interfered with by the God of the Bible.

3. Now, explain James 4:4 in your own words as if you were explaining it to a friend who is confused.

4. Read these verses and write down how Israel’s adultery in the Old Testament times made God feel, knowing He must feel the same way when His New Testament people are not loyal to Him.
a. Jer. 2:11-13
b. Mt. 23:37-39

Because James 4:5 is a very difficult verse in Greek, it has been translated in varying ways. Moo helps us understand the two major ways of understanding this verse: “1. James is referring to God’s jealousy for his people: ‘God yearns jealously for the spirit that he has made to dwell in us’ (NRSV). 2. James is referring to the human tendency to be envious; the spirit he caused to live in us envies intensely (NIV).”

As you can see, these are two very different ideas. Read each with the first part of James 4:6. In the first idea, the greater grace is the ability that God gives us to overcome sin. If the second is correct, James is saying that God’s grace is sufficient to help us remain loyal to God alone.

Stronger Jeans (optional): Read any commentaries or study notes in a study Bible for further insight into James 4:5-6. Write down your thoughts about which translation you tend to accept based on the context.

5. Responding to God: Spend time with God asking Him to show you any disloyalty toward Him in your life. Are you the “world’s friend” in any way? Reread Keddie’s explanation on the previous page. Spend time before God just listening to what He says. Confess your disloyalty before Him and consider how you have made Him feel. Thank Him for His greater grace. Write down what He says to you.

6. Sharing Question: Share one thing with your small group that God showed you in your time with Him. Write down something that you intend to change because of it.

Week 8 - Day 2

Read James 4:4-10.

1. According to 4:6, what kind of person is able to receive that greater grace of God? What descriptions of that kind of person do you see in vv. 7-10?

2. How does humility relate to the friendship with the world (v. 4) that commits adultery against God?

Stronger Jeans (optional): Go back and scan James and consider how humility relates to the other descriptions of faith in the true believer.

3. How do the following verses compare with James’ message in this part of his letter?
a. Ps. 18:27
b. Ps. 51:16-17
c. Ps. 138:6
d. Isa. 61:1
e. Zeph. 3:11-12

4. Sharing Question: Share about a time when you humbled yourself before God and received His grace for your situation, even if He didn’t deliver you from the consequences. What enabled you to recognize the pride in your heart?

5. Responding to God: Thank God for His grace and for His willing desire to give it freely to you when you humble yourself before Him. Is there a situation in your life right now where you need to humble yourself and accept His will and His wisdom rather than your own? Talk to Him about it and write down your thoughts in the form of a prayer or poem.

Week 8 - Day 3

Read James 4:4-10.

Moo says that “to submit to God” means to place ourselves under his lordship and therefore to commit ourselves to obey him in all things.”

1. Compare 1 Peter 5:5-9 with this passage and write down your insights.

James 4:4-10 is a call for repentance from God’s people (meaning us) who have allowed the world to encroach upon their loyalty to God.

Stronger Jeans (optional): Study the term repentance. Look up both Old Testament and New Testament verses to see how they use the word.

2. How does Isa. 57:15 encourage you to humble yourself and repent of anything in your life that fails to put God first?

3. Sharing Question: Is there any area of your life where you are resisting God’s lordship rather than resisting the devil? What one practical thing can you do to help reverse that? It may be memorizing some scriptures that relate; you may need to turn off the television or computer; perhaps, you should refuse to listen to gossip or criticism.

4. Read Ps. 51, David’s humble confession of his adultery. Reread James specific instructions for humbling yourself before God in 4:7-9. Which of these do you see David do in this psalm? How?

5. Responding to God: Use Psalm 51 as a pattern to confess whatever you wrote in question #3. Write it down below.

Week 8 - Day 4

Read James 4:11-12.

1. How do you see these verses relate in the context of the verses that precede them?

Stronger Jeans (optional): Read Lev. 19:15-18, James 4:11-12, and James 2:8. How do they relate?

2. What reasons does James give as to why we should not slander or speak against each other?

3. How does Mt. 7:1-5 relate to what James says here?

The NET Bible translates James 4:11 “Do not speak against one another” while the NIV uses the word “slander” and the KJV says “speak evil”.

Keddie explains that this doesn’t just refer to verbal abuse, but that it includes more:

What the law calls defamation of character and what we call smearing another’s good name, or character-assassination. It is every statement that is made with the purpose of belittling someone, or besmirching his or her reputation, and encompasses everything from out-and-out lies to veiled innuendoes, and even includes true statements when these are told only to hurt the person about whom they are made.

4. Sharing Question: Have you ever been the brunt of that kind of speech? Without sharing the details of who said what, share with your group how it made you feel.

5. Responding to God: Write a prayer confessing any of the kinds of speaking against others that Keddie described. According to Mt. 5:21-24, you may need to go to someone and ask for forgiveness.

Week 8 - Day 5

Read James 4:13-17.

1. Reread James 1:10-11. Compare James’ message in these two passages.

2. James is not saying that planning is wrong, but attitudes may be. What is wrong with the attitude of the person described?

3. What do you learn from Paul’s attitude in the following verses that relates to this passage in James?
a. Acts 18:21
b. Rom. 1:10
c. 1 Cor. 4:19
d. 1 Cor. 16:7

4. Sharing Question: Have you ever been guilty of leaving God out of your plans? If so, what happened? How did you feel?

Moo warns us against thinking that James is telling us to focus on using specific words when we talk about the future: “James attributes no magical significance to the words themselves. ‘If the Lord wills’ can become nothing more than a glib formula without any real meaning.”

5. What insights do you receive from Mt. 25:31-46 into James 4:17?

Stronger Jeans (optional): How does the story of the Good Samaritan relate to James 4:17? Find it with your concordance and read it. Write down your insights.

6. Sharing Question: What plans are you making for the future right now? How much time have you spent asking God for His will in the matter and searching His word for guidance? Is there anything you need to change in your attitude? Be transparent with your group and ask them for prayer about this area.

7. Responding to God: Draw a picture of you, your future, and God. Where do they all fit? Talk to God about where He is in the picture.

Week 8 - Personal Story

Val’s story relates to both last week’s lesson and this week’s lesson. Following the world’s wisdom and pride brought difficult consequences to her family, which humbled them; that opened the door for the blessing and grace of God.

Val’s story
My husband and I were raised in Christian homes and based our marriage on the biblical principles we were taught both at home and in church. As a young couple with babies it was natural and easy to follow those principles, keep a tight budget and prioritize our needs/wants, etc. (Things were pretty basic back then!) However, as the years progressed and my husband’s career progressed, we slowly began to listen to the insidious voices of the world telling us “you deserve this”, “treat yourself to the best”, etc. We listened to our children’s voices saying “everyone else has one”, etc. Before we realized it we were making choices to “keep up with the Jones” instead of following the principles the Bible had taught us. We knew the truth, but turned a deaf ear to it! Even though we were entrenched in church, even holding offices of leadership, we were at the same time trying to keep our children dressed in designer wear like everyone else, choosing only the top camps for them, and our vacations had to be “over the top”—not the familiar beach trip we always had loved and looked forward to each year.

We went through the motions of making investments of the financial resources God was providing and we were following the advice of a faith-based financial firm; however, we were drawn to this group by acquaintances following a prosperity-based gospel and living “well” (at the time we did not know that “well” meant living way beyond their means!) We were praying about each investment, but our hearts were not tuned in to hear God’s wisdom or will for us—we just continually asked Him to bless our choices. Things seemed really good when suddenly the bottom fell out of the market where the bulk of our investments had been made. All our plans for college money, bigger and better homes, cars, etc. were shattered in one swift change of fortune. It was a real awakening for us as we wrestled with God emotionally and He began to show us the errors of our ways and the false hopes placed in the wrong things and for the wrong reasons. We also realized how foolishly we had jeopardized God’s “best” for our family as we indulged ourselves and our children with things of the world.

We confessed our sinful ways to God and to our children, who were nearing college at the time. God was gracious and brought us together as a family committed to do our best to start again—this time under the strong guidance of God’s wisdom, not our own. Almost immediately the blessing of God began to manifest itself in unexpected ways. It was not an instant success story with a fortune dropping from the sky, but it was a daily blessing to meet our needs and help us grow in our faith each time we recognized the hand of God in our situation. With the reality that I would need to go to work full time in order to meet the college expenses, I was blessed with a good management position near home and with wonderful people. (They hired me because they were familiar with my administrative skills with an area women’s bible study group and with various positions held in church—not reasons the world would look at as “worthy” of the position.) A true blessing of God that lasted for ten years when, by my choice and God’s leading, I was able to retire from the job entirely to deal with our aging parents’ needs. It was a true blessing to be able to be there for them as they had been there for us through all our early years. (The following year that firm merged with a larger one and split in many directions—another blessing of God to save me the headaches that would have meant as a manager!)

Our children took on extra jobs while attending college, but never had to miss out on any activity of meaning to them. In fact, in some instances, because of their job positions they were able to be placed in the midst of dignitaries and future acquaintances that would prove very advantageous to future education and job prospects. Another blessing from God. Every time an unexpected expense would arise, the money would be provided in a way only God could have provided. We all were becoming more aware of God’s hand in our lives on a daily basis and we saw our faith grow measurably. We were given opportunity time after time to testify to His goodness and faithfulness to meet our needs. We all became bargain shoppers—and learned what fun it can be—and we all became better managers of God’s gifts to us. We began to invest more in God’s Kingdom work and to personally invest ourselves and our time to help the less fortunate. We had been given a lesson in priorities by God’s wisdom that we had to share with others. Life had more meaning than ever before!!

Today we see the fruits of that period in our lives and are thankful that God took a firm grip of our family and saved us from further destruction. We see our adult children making wise decisions and following after Christ in their lives and marriages. We see them instilling God’s principles in their children and making the difficult calls in guiding them along the way because they know it is what they must do to give them God’s best in the long run of life. The lies of the world are out there to entice and snatch us from the ways of wisdom and they are easy to follow if we don’t ask God daily to help us to see with His eyes what His best is for us. God is faithful and He heaps undeserved grace on us daily. Living in that knowledge is true wisdom that gives true meaning to life. We thank Him for teaching us His Truth.

JANES Blog System

I hope you don't mind but we are playing around with the blog format. Everything is still the same! Also, check out the new Bay Area Fellowship JANES Blog (Women's Ministry) system. It is totally cool!!! Good job Alisa!!!

Week 7 - Introduction: Faith that Brings Peace

Wisdom for a Blue Jean Faith (Week 7 Memory Verse)

“But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, accommodating, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial, and not hypocritical.”

James 3:17 (NET)

Although each Christmas we sing the angel’s words of peace on earth and talk about Jesus being the Prince of Peace, there is no peace. Our world is full of conflict and war; we watch and wish for the day of peace to actually come.

When I think about peace, I not only wish for peace on earth but also peace between people. It seems that our lives are also full of conflict and strife. More and more I see the effects of sin on our relationships with others—marriages broken by selfishness; extended families torn by conflict; and friendships marred by jealousy and ambition.

Someday, Jesus will return and bring in the peace for which we all long. Until that day, however, we are to work to bring His peace into our lives and the lives of those whom we touch—another practical aspect of Blue Jean Faith!

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How To Use This Study Guide (Review)

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Weekly:

Wisdom for a Blue Jean Faith —Each week you will have a verse to memorize that brings out an essential lesson or thought from the week’s study. Begin learning it the first day, hiding God’s Word in your heart.

Personal Stories —Each lesson includes a true story that relates the truths of the week’s lesson to a woman’s real life experience. Some of the names have been changed to protect the guilty! These stories will encourage you in your walk with God and your growth in godliness.

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Specific types of questions included in each day’s work:

1. Sharing Questions are designed for you to write stories, insights, and applications from your own life. You will never be forced to share one of these answers aloud (post a comment) with your group, but growing in community with one another requires us to be open and vulnerable so volunteer to share.

2. Responding to God Questions are reminders that we study God’s Word so that He can speak to us and we are changed thereby. We should be listening for His voice. These types of questions ask for a response to God’s personal message to you. I have found that writing out my prayers helps me to focus better on what I need to say to God. No one will ask you to read (post) yours, but you should always feel free to share your response with your group.

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3. Stronger Jeans are optional questions designed for those who want to dig deeper. Some of the answers will be easy for even a beginning Bible student, and some will require more experience in God’s Word.

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Week 1: Faith for Hard Times

Week 2: Faith that Leans on God

Week 3: Faith that Fixes What's in the Mirror

Week 4: Faith that Doesn't Play Favorites

Week 5: Faith that is Alive

Week 6: Faith that Ties the Tongue

Week 7: Faith that Brings Peace

Week 8: Faith that Repents

Week 9: Faith that Looks to Jesus' Coming

Week 10: Faith that Prays

Week 7 - Day 1

Read James 3:13-18. Today we will focus on v. 13.

1. What proves that a person is wise (3:13)? Be specific in your description.

2. What do you learn about “gentleness” (NET, NASB), “humility” (NIV), or “meekness” (KJV, NKJV) from these verses?
a. Mt. 11:29
b. 2 Cor. 10:1
c. Mt. 5:5

Stronger Jeans (optional): Use your study tools or bible.org to look up the Greek word for gentleness or meekness in James 3:13. What do you learn?

What is wisdom anyway? Ethel Barrett puts it as “the ability to take the facts and relate them to your life, to put them into action.” Hiebert says that the word wise “described the individual who possessed moral insight and skill in deciding practical issues of conduct.” Wisdom is about Blue Jean Faith—it’s practical!

3. How are James 3:13 and James 2:14-18 similar?

4. What do these cross-references say about the importance of living out the kinds of good deeds that would prove wisdom?
a. 1 Peter 2:12
b. 1 Peter 3:1-2
c. 1 Peter 3:16

5. Sharing Question: Perhaps James is challenging you with his question in 3:13. In what areas have you considered yourself wise? Your parenting, your success at work, your marriage, your money? (Let’s face it; we all have areas where we feel we are smart! Or at least smarter than others. Do you pass James’ test for wisdom? Why or why not?

6. Responding to God question: Talk to God about what He has shown you today about wisdom. What area of your life does not reflect that kind of wisdom? Write your thoughts down below.

Week 7 - Day 2

Review James 3:13-18.

1. Contrast verses 13 and 14.

2. Contrast vv. 14-16 with what you learn about the character of God in 1 Cor. 14:33.

Stronger Jeans (optional): Use your study tools to look up the meaning of “bitter envy” and “selfishness” that are found in 3:14. (See the next question for these words in other translations.) Write down any additional insights that you receive.

3. Sharing Question: Most of the translations of 3:14 use the terms “bitter jealousy” or “bitter envy” and either “selfishness” or “selfish ambition” to describe this kind of wisdom. Tell about a situation in your own life when this kind of heart attitude threatened to overtake you. In other words, either someone else mistreated you because of his/her bitter jealousy or selfish ambition or you had those feelings yourself. Maybe it was a situation of competition or maybe someone was envious.

4. What is the source of this kind of wisdom (3:15)? And what is its outcome (3:16)?

The word translated in James 3:16 as “disorder” (NET, NASB, NIV) or “confusion” (KJV, NKJV) is another form of the word in Jam. 1:8 and 3:8, which describes a double-minded person and a double-speaking tongue.

5. Read all three of the verses just mentioned. What similarities do you see among the ideas in the use of this word in all three situations? How does this help you better understand the outcome of earthly wisdom?

6. Responding to God: Write down your feelings about what God has shown you today concerning earthly wisdom. Perhaps you need to confess an area where you have been guilty of earthly wisdom. Talk to God about your insights and responses.

Week 7 - Day 3 and 4

Days 3 & 4 are 1 study but was divided for your convenience!

Reread James 3:13-18. After seeing yesterday what earthly wisdom is, today and tomorrow we will focus on what true wisdom looks like in vv. 17-18.

1. What contrasts do you see between the wisdom of 3:14-16 and the wisdom of 3:17-18?

2. Compare the characteristics of the wisdom in James 3:17-18 with Gal. 5:22-23. What does the passage in Galatians add to your understanding of such wisdom, if anything?

3. Read the beatitudes in Mt. 5:3-12. Write down any parallels to the characteristics of heavenly wisdom in James.

4. Sharing Question: Share about a time when God gave you the wisdom that you needed in a specific situation. As you look at this passage, you can see that it corresponds to the character of His wisdom. How does it make you feel that God did this for you?

Stronger Jeans (optional): Look up meanings of the characteristics of heavenly wisdom. Use all the extra time you have for both days on this assignment.

Week 7 - Day 3 and 4 (Continued)

Review James 3:13-18.

1. What do you learn about true godly wisdom from the following verses? How do they relate to this passage in James?
a. Prov. 9:10
b. Prov. 3:13-18

2. How does Rom. 12:3 help you better understand the characteristic in James 3:17 translated “accommodating” (NET), “submissive” (NIV), “reasonable” (NASB) or “willing to yield” (NKJV)?

3. What do these verses reveal about mercy (v. 17)?
a. Psalm 103:8
b. Eph. 2:4
c. Mt. 23:23

4. I entitled this lesson “faith that brings peace”. How does James 3:13-18 relate to peace?

5. Sharing Question: Chances are that most of us are currently seeking guidance about something going on in our lives. Think of one thing for which you need guidance; make a list of possible courses of action. Then, compare that list to the characteristics and outcomes of the two kinds of wisdom. Does this point you to a specific direction? How?

6. Responding to God: Write a prayer or poem to God, thanking Him for the greatness of His wisdom. Use this passage and go through the characteristics one by one as you talk to Him.

Before we leave our focus on God’s wisdom versus the world’s wisdom, I want you to read the story of a woman who forsook God’s wisdom and was almost destroyed by it; however, in God’s grace and mercy He continues to call her back to her love for Him and to His wisdom. Her story reminds us all that although God totally forgives us for turning away from His best for us, we may still have to deal with the consequences.

Mary’s story
You never thought it could happen to you!! Well folks it does happen and usually at the wrong times. I was once a happy person. I loved life, family, God and friends. But something along the path of life changed that for me drastically. I cannot say this is a happy tale or will have a happy ending. But I can say that God is working overtime on my shriveled up soul.

The trouble all began this year about 6 months ago. I sought a path that led me to a dark period in my life. We will call it the rebellion of God’s wisdom. I am an at home mother and spend most of my days home bored to tears with housework and raising my son. I soon discovered online computer games and chat rooms. Well over time I had consumed my days with “entertaining” myself rather than being a mom and wife. I had made friends online and spent as much time “talking” to them as I could. I found tremendous joy in sharing my life with them. I had meaning and felt important to others, and soon discovered that I no longer felt lonely during the day but I did not see the consequences that were developing in my real life.

During all this time my house and family suffered for I ignored them and spent every moment I could spare filling my void with worldly attention and wisdom. Things such as you are beautiful, you owe it to yourself, it is ok to flirt with other men, its just a game it is not real were drilled into my heart. These things began to rot my soul. I tried to make it real since my loneliness in the real world was growing phenomenally. I resented my husband for not talking to me like I wanted and I began to shut him and my son out of my life. I felt miserable, not realizing it was because I was causing it. I sought solace in my “friends” online. I became depressed, angry, bitter, and hateful. I wanted out of the marriage so I could live my own life like I wanted to away from God and family. I ignored all the red flags that God was sending my way. I blamed God and my family for my feelings. Satan sure loved having his way with me during this time.

Our last study was hard to take for me because every lesson was saying the same thing over and over and over again. STOP what you are doing and anchor yourself in ME!!! Well I blatantly told God NO! I don’t want to quit this! I feel happy when I am doing these things. But in my heart I knew I was wrong. Loudly he kept calling me to Him to return to his word and seek him for love and acceptance. Six months later still ignoring his call and wrapped in sin I realized something must be done. I was so willing to give up on everything and completely ruin my life.

Still ignoring God, I sought to have my husband fill the void. I confronted him on the issues that I was facing. I wanted to love him like I loved my online friends. I knew I had hurt him and that loving me would be a huge sacrifice for him. We were tired of living two different lives and trying to act like nothing was wrong. I was still trying to fill my life with something worldly though. I realized that even my beloved, kind wonderful husband cannot fill what I am missing no matter how hard he tries.

So this brings us to the present day experiences I am facing. I now realize that God’s wisdom is pure, good and does not place chains on you and that worldly wisdom binds you to a fate that tears you apart. I know this in my head but had purged it from my heart. So I have to fight very hard to reverse this process of lies and deceit that the world has placed upon me. I still find myself drawn to sin because lets face it sin is fun and easy…but it is also destructive. Doing the right thing is incredibly hard but in the end it will be worth everything.

For now the war rages on but I now have rediscovered my shield against the swords and daggers assaulting me. The word of God and his Spirit guards my very soul. Pray for me and my family as I enter into battle against Satan with Jesus and his Father by my side and His word leading me on the right paths.

Note from Kay: If you, like Mary, have followed the world’s wisdom and now find yourself having a hard time leaving where it has taken you, find support from other believers. God has designed us to find support from one another when we are weak. Despite the fear of rejection that you may have as you think about sharing your situation, you must trust God for other women who will continue to love you and pray for your best. I so appreciate the courage it took for this woman to share her story!

Week 7 - Day 5

Read James 4:1-3.

Moo's perspective is that the entire section of 3:13-4:12 is connected to peace.

Stronger Jeans (optional): Look in any commentaries that you have. Do you feel this entire section 3:13-4:12 is connected to peace? Do you see something else?

1. If this is one topic relating to peace, as Moo says, how do you see 4:1-3 connect to the preceding paragraph in 3:13-18?

2. What is the origin of conflict according to 4:1? (Although he focuses on conflict within the church, the same principle applies to other conflicts.)

3. What are the two causes why these believers didn’t have what they desired (vv. 2-3)? What does Mt. 6:9-10 add to your understanding of why a prayer may not be answered?

4. Sharing Question: I know that many of you have been part of a church where conflict arose, perhaps within the entire church or within one ministry area or even a small group. Without giving a lot of information about it and certainly no names, what passions or desires contributed to it? Can you see any selfish desires behind some of what happened? What feelings did you have in the midst of this situation?

5. Sharing Question: What desire do you have right now that is not being fulfilled. Review question #25. Do any of these causes fit your situation? Consider Mt. 7:7-12 and share with your group what you need to do next.

6. Responding to God: Confess any lack of prayer or selfish desires that God has shown you. How should you pray about the situation in light of what you have seen today?

Personal Story

Kathy shares a story of conflict that came from the kind of desire that James describes.

Kathy’s story
A number of years ago a young family moved in across the alley from our family and we formed a friendship due primarily to the fact that we both had small children who played together. Our neighbor’s girls stair-stepped between our two older girls and there were many days spent playing together.

The mother of these little girls was a believer but despite our children’s friendship, ours as mothers just did not seem to develop beyond a superficial level. She was often critical of my children about little things and this puzzled me. One day as we were visiting in my den, this neighbor just blurted out, “Why does God love you more than He does me? You have a godly husband and everything is wonderful for you. My husband isn’t a believer and our marriage isn’t anything like yours.” Suddenly the distance and hostility I had felt from her made sense as the envy and jealously she had harbored against God and me came pouring out. I was able to share with her that God does not have favorites and that He is working in each believer’s situation for good.

We moved from our neighborhood shortly after this and it saddens me even now to realize that envy and coveting kept us from being the friends we could have been had that not been the case. I feel that we could have benefited greatly from sharing our lives together and growing in our understanding of the Lord’s work in both our lives. Unfortunately, that did not happen.

I trust that anyone reading this will examine your heart to make sure that envy and coveting are not keeping you from something that God would like to bring into your life to encourage and build you up, not tear you down.

Week 6 - Introduction: Faith that Ties the Tongue

Wisdom for a Blue Jean Faith (Week 6 Memory Verse)

“From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. These things should not be so, my brothers and sisters.”

James 3:10 (NET)

“Nanny, nanny, boo boo!” I don’t think I really know what that means and am not even sure those are really the words that children use to taunt one another! But I do know that they represent the power of the tongue! This week James emphasizes the power over others that our words have—a true test of Blue Jean Faith! According to James, the tongue is hardest part of the body to control!

How To Use This Study Guide (Review)
___________________________________

Weekly:

Wisdom for a Blue Jean Faith —Each week you will have a verse to memorize that brings out an essential lesson or thought from the week’s study. Begin learning it the first day, hiding God’s Word in your heart.

Personal Stories —Each lesson includes a true story that relates the truths of the week’s lesson to a woman’s real life experience. Some of the names have been changed to protect the guilty! These stories will encourage you in your walk with God and your growth in godliness.
___________________________________

Specific types of questions included in each day’s work:

1. Sharing Questions are designed for you to write stories, insights, and applications from your own life. You will never be forced to share one of these answers aloud (post a comment) with your group, but growing in community with one another requires us to be open and vulnerable so volunteer to share.

2. Responding to God Questions are reminders that we study God’s Word so that He can speak to us and we are changed thereby. We should be listening for His voice. These types of questions ask for a response to God’s personal message to you. I have found that writing out my prayers helps me to focus better on what I need to say to God. No one will ask you to read (post) yours, but you should always feel free to share your response with your group.

3. Stronger Jeans are optional questions designed for those who want to dig deeper. Some of the answers will be easy for even a beginning Bible student, and some will require more experience in God’s Word.
___________________________________

Week 1: Faith for Hard Times
Week 2: Faith that Leans on God
Week 3: Faith that Fixes What's in the Mirror
Week 4: Faith that Doesn't Play Favorites
Week 5: Faith that is Alive
Week 6: Faith that Ties the Tongue
Week 7: Faith that Brings Peace
Week 8: Faith that Repents
Week 9: Faith that Looks to Jesus' Coming
Week 10: Faith that Prays

Week 6 - Day 1

Read James 3:1-12.

1. What would you say is James’ main point in this section of his letter? Remember to look for repetition!

2. Today we will consider 3:1. What is James’ warning and how does it relate to the rest of the section?

3. What do these verses say about the place of teaching in the church?
a. Mt. 28:18-20
b. Acts 13:1-3
c. 1 Cor. 12:27-28
d. Eph. 4:11-12


4. What is the message in these verses for those who are gifted to teach?
a. Rom. 12:3-8
b. 1 Cor. 12:7
c. 1 Peter 4:10-11

5. What warning did Paul give those who wanted to teach in 1 Tim. 1:7? How does it relate to James’ warning?

Stronger Jeans (optional): Use your concordance or the NET Bible tools to find other New Testament references to teachers, teach, or teaching. Write down your insights and thoughts from these verses.

6. Sharing Question: How have you been influenced positively or negatively by a teacher—either in the church or even in a secular setting? What feelings did that person bring into your life with his or her words?

7. Responding to God: Spend time thanking God for the teachers who have influenced you most and pray specifically for them to be able to control their tongues in light of their influence over others. Write down your prayer.

Week 6 - Day 2

Reread James 3:1-6.

1. What is James point about the tongue in vv. 2-5? Explain how the three illustrations relate to his point.

2. Which of the three illustrations helps you best understand his point? How did that one illustration help?

3. James emphasizes the power of words in v. 6. Summarize his message in your own words.

4. Read Gal. 5:19-21, where Paul lists works of the flesh, in contrast to the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22-23). Which of the works relate to our words? How?

Stronger Jeans (optional): Research horses and bits or ships and rudders to see what you learn about them that helps you understand these illustrations better.

5. Sharing Question: Give an example in your own life, without sharing names or identities, of a time when someone’s words impacted you in the way described in James 3:6.

6. Responding to God: Write a prayer for God to help you control your tongue so that you do not do what is described in 3:6.

Week 6 - Day 3

Read James 3:1-12.


Today we will focus on vv. 7-12.

1. What contrast does James use to make his point in vv. 7-8? What is the point?


2. What example of the misuse of words does James give in vv. 9-10? Why are these two utterances incompatible in light of vv. 11-12? (I hope you are working on learning James 3:10!)


3. Compare Jesus’ words in Mt. 12:33-37 with what James says in this passage on the tongue (3:1-12). Write down your insights.

4. What do you learn from Jesus in Mt. 5:21-26 about the seriousness of your words and about dealing with the sins of the tongue?

Stronger Jeans (optional): How does John 17 relate to this issue of our words against our fellow believers?

5. Sharing Question: Now, let’s tell the truth here! Have you ever been guilty, as I have, of somehow “cursing” someone and then coming to church and blessing God? How guilty did you feel? Write down some part of that story to share with your group. What should you have done differently in light of the Matthew passage you just read?

6. Responding to God: Spend time before God, asking Him to show you if there is anyone in your life to whom you need to confess your sin of “cursing” them before you come worship! Believe that God does forgive but He asks you to act to restore the relationship first. Write down your response to Him.

Week 6 - Day 4

Read James 3:1-12.

1. James has previously mentioned the tongue. What did he say about it in 1:26? How does that verse relate to this entire section on the tongue?

2. The practical book of Proverbs has much to say about our words! Ask God to speak to you personally through these scriptures. Read them and write down the gist of the message and your insights. Note parallels to James.
a. Prov. 10:8
b. Prov. 10:11
c. Prov. 10:21
d. Prov. 11:9
e. Prov. 12:18
f. Prov. 12:25
g. Prov. 13:3
h. Prov. 16:27
i. Prov. 17:14
j. Prov. 18:7
k. Prov. 18:21
l. Prov. 26:22

3. Sharing Question: Which of the above scriptures was most meaningful to you? Why? Did God convict you of anything that you need to change in your communication with others?


Stronger Jeans (optional): Use your previous familiarity with the scriptures to think of biblical stories that relate to the use of words. Look them up and reread them.


4. Responding to God: Draw a picture (just do it!) of one of James’ illustrations in 3:1-12. Talk to God about anything that today’s lesson has surfaced in your life.

Week 6 - Day 5

Reread James 3:1-12.

1. James says that we must use self-control over our tongues (3:2, 8). Let’s look at some other verses that deal with self-control. Write down your insights from each verse.
a. 1 Cor. 9:24-25
b. Gal. 5:22-23
c. 2 Tim. 1:7
d. 2 Tim. 3:1-3
e. 2 Peter 1:5-6

2. From the verses in the previous question, what would you say is the key to developing self-control in the area of the tongue? On what do you base that?

Stronger Jeans (optional): Use your study tools or a topical index or Bible to find verses that deal with the positive ways to use your tongue.

3. Sharing Question: What is the primary message that God has given you this week about your own life? Share one thing that you intend to change about your words or your dependence on God.

4. Responding to God: Write a prayer or poem committing to that one thing that you shared in the sharing question.

Week 6 - Personal Story

This week’s story highlights the destructive power of the tongue and the forgiveness necessary to respond as God desires. If you need to forgive someone who has hurt you with unkind words, you may want to check out the four promises of forgiveness from Peacemaker Ministries.

1. "I will not dwell on this incident."
2. "I will not bring up this incident again and use it against you."
3. "I will not talk to others about this incident."
4. "I will not let this incident stand between us or hinder our personal relationship."

Carole’s story
I was once had a very close friend in my church who had a leadership position in one of the ministries in the church where I was also serving as a volunteer. On this particular day she was assigned as a greeter; instead, this friend came downstairs and began to help me with my duties. I approached her and told her that I needed her to greet the people in her assigned area. At this point, she turned on me and began to call me names, etc. I was very stunned as I thought we were friends and from the things she was saying to me, it was very obvious to me that not only did she not consider me to be a friend, she did not even like me.

I was devastated and sought counsel from godly people. One of those told me that I needed to shoulder the responsibility, die to self, and apologize to her. This was one of the most difficult things I have ever done. I went to her house and apologized for having upset her and asked her to forgive me. She said she forgave me but she continued to berate me. Over the months, I kept reading scriptures on forgiveness. I would tell God that I had forgiven her but then in my mind I would rehearse how she had wronged me and not the reverse. No matter how hard I prayed and how often I made the statement, “I choose to forgive,” I got no peace on the matter. Finally about one year after the incident, I wrote her an e-mail (she no longer was speaking to me) and told her how she had hurt me and the difficulty I was having with forgiveness. I told her that I was choosing to forgive her for hurting me whether she forgave me or not and at that point, I found peace. She never responded and continued to walk past me without speaking. That was 5 years ago. I have been invited to many functions where she is present. I have chosen to be pleasant to her and to continue to pray for her.

As I went to write this story I had to search my heart again to make certain that I had truly forgiven her. I began to ask myself if I truly loved her with the love that Jesus commanded of us. I had to go back to a period of repentance until I was certain that I do love her and could in fact be friends with her again should the opportunity present itself. The interesting thing is that the day I spent this time in repentance and prayer about her for this article, I received my first Christmas card from her in a number of years. Perhaps God is working in more than one heart on this issue.

I do know that the tongue can wreck friendships and bring great pain in the process. I probably spoke more sharply to her than I should have as I was under a great deal of stress that day. I never cease to be amazed at how deeply this one shattered friendship hurt me.

Week 5 - Introduction: Faith that is Alive

Wisdom for a Blue Jean Faith (Week 5 Memory Verse)

“For just as the body without the spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead.”

James 2:26

I don’t have a green thumb. I know little about plants at all. What I do know is the obvious—when the plant is dead, there are no flowers or fruit of any kind. I have lots of experience with dead plants! When the plant is alive and healthy, it produces something!

James says that faith is like a plant. Faith that is truly alive produces something! The evidence is there!

How To Use This Study Guide (Review)

___________________________________

Weekly:

Wisdom for a Blue Jean Faith —Each week you will have a verse to memorize that brings out an essential lesson or thought from the week’s study. Begin learning it the first day, hiding God’s Word in your heart.

Personal Stories —Each lesson includes a true story that relates the truths of the week’s lesson to a woman’s real life experience. Some of the names have been changed to protect the guilty! These stories will encourage you in your walk with God and your growth in godliness.

___________________________________

Specific types of questions included in each day’s work:

1. Sharing Questions are designed for you to write stories, insights, and applications from your own life. You will never be forced to share one of these answers aloud (post a comment) with your group, but growing in community with one another requires us to be open and vulnerable so volunteer to share.

2. Responding to God Questions are reminders that we study God’s Word so that He can speak to us and we are changed thereby. We should be listening for His voice. These types of questions ask for a response to God’s personal message to you. I have found that writing out my prayers helps me to focus better on what I need to say to God. No one will ask you to read (post) yours, but you should always feel free to share your response with your group.

3. Stronger Jeans are optional questions designed for those who want to dig deeper. Some of the answers will be easy for even a beginning Bible student, and some will require more experience in God’s Word.

___________________________________

Week 1: Faith for Hard Times

Week 2: Faith that Leans on God

Week 3: Faith that Fixes What's in the Mirror

Week 4: Faith that Doesn't Play Favorites

Week 5: Faith that is Alive

Week 6: Faith that Ties the Tongue

Week 7: Faith that Brings Peace

Week 8: Faith that Repents

Week 9: Faith that Looks to Jesus' Coming

Week 10: Faith that Prays

Week 5 - Day 1

Read James 2:14-26.

1. What would you say is the theme of this passage? To find the theme is not to find something hidden, but to find what is repeated over and over! What does James repeat here?

This passage on its face seems to contradict other scriptures, particularly some that Paul wrote. Because we recognize that the Bible is God’s word, we believe that there is a way to understand both without seeing them as contradictions. Today we want to see what Paul and other biblical authors have said so that later this week we can see how James relates. Understanding what they are saying allows us to live in alignment with God’s purposes and plans for our lives—the best place to be!

Our reading deals with that biblical term “salvation.” Salvation involves a work of God where He brings people into relationship with Him. When we are “saved” from a flood, a drowning situation, etc., we are physically removed from the situation. We live because we are rescued from danger. When we are saved spiritually, God rescues us from the danger that we are in—the danger of being dead spiritually; the danger of not being truly alive as God’s creatures; the danger of living outside of the purposes of God; the danger of choosing to live eternally apart from the love of the Creator—and brings us into His own family where He cares for us and gives us great life purpose.

1. Read these passages about salvation and write down how someone gets the salvation that we just talked about:
a. Rom. 3:28 (“Declared righteous” suggests that God announces that we are in right relationship with Him, which happens in salvation.)
b. Gal. 2:16 (To be “justified” connotes that same declaration of righteousness that God gives those whom He rescues.)
c. Acts 16:31

2. Why can we not save or rescue ourselves? Read these verses and write down your thoughts.
a. Isa. 53:6
b. Rom. 3:23; 6:23

3. God loves you so much that He reaches out in love to rescue you from danger and death when you are unable to save yourself. Read these verses about His love and write down your thoughts and feelings as you read them:
a. Rom. 5:6-8
b. John 3:16-17
c. 1 John 4:9-10

Stronger Jeans (optional): Use a concordance and Greek dictionary or bible.org to study the word salvation and look up other New Testament references to it.

4. Sharing Question: When did you first hear about the love of God reaching out to rescue you? Share that memory and your feelings about it with your group.

5. Responding to God: Respond to God’s love by writing a prayer or singing Him a love song. If you are familiar with songs of the church, you may want to sing “I Love You, Lord” or “Amazing Grace”.

Week 5 - Day 2

Reread James 2:14-17.

1. What kind of faith does James describe here, faith that is alive or dead? How does he illustrate it?

2. Think about this illustration. How does it make James’ point about living faith?

In v. 14, James says, “Can this kind of faith save him?” The note in the NET Bible says this: “Grk ‘the faith’ referring to the kind of faith just described; faith without works. The article here is anaphoric, referring to the previous mention of the noun pistis in the verse.” It goes on to say that the way the Greek is written, the answer is expected to be “no”.

3. Dead faith cannot save; true faith is alive. Life is often used to describe salvation. Read Jesus’ words in these verses, and write down what He says about salvation and life. How do they relate to James?
a. John 3:3-7
b. John 3:16
c. John 4:14
d. John 5:24
e. John 6:51
f. John 10:27-30

Stronger Jeans (optional): Look up the meaning of the Greek word for faith and other cross-references in the New Testament. Write down your insights.

4. Sharing Question: Rom. 8:31-39 has a similar message to Jn. 10:27-30. Read it as an encouragement to your faith today. Share how the certainty of God’s love makes you feel.

5. Responding to God: Use Rom. 8:31-39 as a basis for your prayer, thanking God for His great salvation that begins at the point of belief and continues throughout eternity.

Week 5 - Day 3

Read James 2:14-19.

1. How does James make it clear in 2:18-19 that faith must be more than a “faith” that merely talks and expresses intellectual assent?

2. In v. 19 James is likely referring to the shema, one of the most basic beliefs of the Jews, his likely audience. Read the shema in Deut. 6:4 and copy it below.

There are many in our churches today who may be saying they have faith but who fail the test of true living faith that James describes—maybe even some of us. Perhaps our church culture or background involves quoting a creed, such as “The Apostles’ Creed”, and we say the words with no more real faith than the demons have. When we partake of the bread and wine of communion, we are saying that we have believed in Jesus and partaken of His life when we may not have truly done so. Or perhaps we simply tell others that we are Christians and believe in Jesus without any real concern for the life that He asks us to live.

3. What warning does Paul give the Corinthians in 2 Cor. 13:5?

4. What tests of faith do you see in James 1:1-2:26?

Stronger Jeans (optional): Many scholars see 1 John as a test of the life of your faith. Read through it and consider that perspective. What tests do you see there?

5. Sharing Question: Have your words about Jesus ever been hollow and without life? If you grew up in the church, did you ever proclaim to believe with your words but not with your life? If so, share how God showed you that you failed the test.

6. Responding to God: Write an honest prayer before God. Talk to Him about the tests of faith that James talks about in this passage and where you truly are compared to his words.

Week 5 - Day 4

Read James 2:20-24.

1. What person does James use first to illustrate his point? What works does he cite as proof of his faith?

2. Read the story of Abraham and Isaac in Gen. 22:1-14 and then the New Testament commentary on it in Heb. 11:17-19. Write down how you see Abraham’s faith.

Stronger Jeans (optional): Read your commentaries on Hebrews 11:17-19.

3. In Rom. 4:1-5 Paul also discusses Abraham’s faith. These verses refer back to Gen. 15:1-6. Read both of these passages. Again, Paul seems to contradict James. What are your thoughts about the problem at this point? You may want to review what you wrote down when you did Days 1-3 lessons. Take time to ask God to help you understand how the two are not contradictory. We’ll continue looking at it tomorrow also.

4. Read these passages written by Paul, and write down how these parallel rather than sound contradictory to what James says:
a. Rom. 1:5
b. Gal. 5:6

5. Sharing Question: What has changed in your life since you were rescued from death that shows your faith to others?

6. Responding to God: Write down a prayer that expresses your desire to show your faith to other people. How should you respond to God’s great gift?

Week 5 - Day 5

Read James 2:20-26.

1. Rahab is the second person that James uses to prove that faith works out in action. Read her story in Joshua 2:1-16, and write down how you see her faith.

2. Read Jesus’ words in the Sermon on the Mount in Mt. 7:21-27. How do they relate to James 2:14-26?

Stronger Jeans (optional): Read your commentaries on Mt. 7:21-27 and write down any insights that help you better understand this passage.

3. How do these verses help you understand how faith and works relate?
a. Eph. 2:8-10
b. 1 Thess. 1:2-3
c. Titus 2:14


As you think about how James relates to Paul, perhaps Moo’s comments will help:

Critical to understanding the argument of the section and integrating it successfully into a broader biblical perspective is the recognition that James is not arguing that works must be added to faith. His point, rather, is that genuine biblical faith will inevitably be characterized by works. Trying to add works to a bogus faith is an exercise in futility, for only by “accepting the implanted word” (1:21) and experiencing the inner transformation that it brings can one produce works pleasing to God.

Alexander Ross also comments, saying that Paul and James “are not antagonists facing each other with crossed swords; they stand back to back, confronting different foes of the Gospel.”


4. Think about what “foe of the gospel” James confronts as you go back through James 2:14-26. Write down an explanation of this Bible passage as if you had to explain it to someone who had never studied it.

5. Sharing Question: If you have been rescued, accepting God’s merciful gift of salvation through faith in Jesus, share a short version of your journey to true faith. If you have not, consider what is keeping you from that kind of faith.

6. Responding to God: If you have been rescued by God and brought into life, spend your prayer time thanking Him for that gift. If you have never come into life by believing on Jesus, realize that faith is a journey. Talk to God about where you are and ask Him to move you forward on that path. Talk to your small group leader about your journey. Ask her to pray for your understanding and faith.

Week 5 - Personal Stories

We have two stories this week about salvation. The first involves the story of a woman who realized that others who call themselves Christians and believe that Jesus is God who died for them, may still be trusting that their works will earn them an eternal relationship with God. They don’t grasp the truth of James, that works are the evidence of salvation, not the cause of it. The second story is about a young woman’s journey of faith.

Stephanie’s story
Years ago, I was very active youth group which was responsible for bringing me to faith in the Lord when I was in Jr. High. There I met and made instant friends with Carissa, who attended a different church than I did. We did everything together and had and still have a dear friendship. Until recently our religious differences had never been an issue.

Several months ago I had occasion to go to church with her. I was in total shock from the message of the sermon, which instructed the congregation that church attendance was required for salvation. While listening to this message I was stirring in my seat, not sure if I should stand and shout...."Wow you seem very confused....Jesus died for you already, don't think for an instant that you can do anything yourself to change that!" However, I sat there and bit my tongue.

As the service continued, the time for communion came, and I was not sure what to do. After asking a friend who indicated that I should participate, I proceeded up to receive communion. Well, Carissa informed me after church in a very blunt strict way that I am not welcome to receive communion there. My heart was totally broken that she believed that the rules of her church excluded me from being her sister in God.

At that moment I realized that she believed that she and her church were the only ones going to heaven because they followed their rules and obligations made by man. What I heard that day was not about faith in Jesus but about doing enough good works to earn God’s favor. I also knew at that point that God had led me down the right road to this point because everything I knew to be true just came flowing out of me to her in response. With a lot of tears we departed feeling a little beat up.

This event has put me in deep prayer for my friend. She later wrote me a sweet note about how she was sorry and that she just wanted to share the "rules" of her church with me. Although we haven't talked much lately, my bitterness over the situation has diminished with much thought and mostly prayer. I know that she may want to complete the discussion we started and that God will speak through me. She may not agree with me, but I know we both believe that Jesus died for us. I believe that he did it all and that there is nothing else I can do for my salvation. Wow!! What a relief not to have all those burdens and guilt of my sins hanging over me. He has forgiven me already and has accepted me to join him when my day comes; no matter what I do today can't mess that up. I just want to live for Him!

Amy’s Story
I grew up in what I thought was a very "normal" family, even average to the point of boring. I grew up with both of my parents and my younger brother all living under one roof in a Dallas suburb. I was referred to as the "good kid" where as my younger brother was more the black sheep. I made good grades, usually A's, I was a ballet dancer, a softball player, a volleyball player, a basketball player, a singer in the choir and the teacher's pet -- how much more well rounded could I get? My parents would tell you that they're "good people", and even today I would agree with that. They have good work ethic, always had a job and provided the necessities for my brother and me, donate used clothing and occasionally money to charity, you know, the basic responsible citizens. The only thing really different from my friends’ homes was that my parents often invited friends over and there was usually a party at our house on the weekend including alcohol, but no drugs, and after all, most adults drank a little, right? Besides, that just meant that all my friends wanted to spend the night at my house because there was always something fun going on and we always had good junk food.

Well, one summer when I was 13, two of my best friends (twin sisters) invited me to church camp. We were going to sleep in cabins and play games and do a lot of outdoor activities--that sounded like great fun to me. I was also told that we were going to do some Bible study things and I was totally fine with that, too. After all, my family believed that there was a God. I had once asked my mom what religion we were and her reply was, “ . . . (long pause of silence). . . uhh, Christian, I guess,” so I should fit in other than not knowing very many people. The next week changed my life forever. ~Never underestimate the power of inviting someone to church~

I spent the first few days of camp having fun and getting to know people. But with each passing day I was remembering my childhood fear of death and always wondering what happened afterwards. As a young child I would sometimes cry myself to sleep because I was so scared of not knowing what was beyond death, and I remembered my parents not having an answer to that fear. But with each Bible study and worship session we had at camp, I was finding answers that no one had been able to give me before. It was the first time in my life that I had heard of eternal life, salvation, grace, and the sacrificial Lamb. I was captivated by all of this information and I couldn’t wait to learn more. One of the things that made a huge impression on me was the older high school guys. During the worship sessions these guys that were several years older, twice my size, and very tough on the outside, would break down and cry and talk about how grateful they were that Jesus died for their sins. The display of such raw emotion from all these big, tough guys was absolutely dumbfounding and made it all that more real to me. I was repeatedly asked if I was ready to “accept Christ into my heart” but I still felt like I was just getting a grasp on the whole concept and I didn’t want to leap into anything just because of an emotional high. I knew that my decision better be one that I was prepared to live out for the rest of my life, this was no light subject. I finished the week of camp without accepting Christ, but thirsting for more of this information and wanting desperately to better understand the Bible.

I spent the next few months going to church on Sundays and Wednesdays with those same friends who invited me to church and learned more and more each week. I wanted to make sure I knew exactly what I was dealing with before I turned my soul over to it. At first it was hard to understand that I was sinner daily, not just occasionally. I was accustomed to being the good kid, and good at just about everything that I did. I didn’t lie and steal like my brother. I didn’t cuss and drink like my parents. I wasn’t doing drugs and experimenting with sex like the kids at school. I tried to always be honest, do what I was told, and excel in everything. Sure, I messed up sometimes, but much less than everyone around me, or so it seemed. Maybe a couple of times a year my brother would make me so mad I let out a four-letter-expletive, or maybe I would not tell the whole truth about how late I stayed up on the phone on a school night, but that was about it and they were such trivial little things, really.

Slowly but surely I began to see how selfishly I lived my life. I made good grades to compete with my genius best friend, I tried to be a good athlete to satisfy my father, I stayed out of trouble to avoid punishment, I was living for my purposes and not God’s, that’s where the sin was coming from. That fall I accepted Christ as my savior and submitted my life to God at a volleyball tournament where I was pulled out of game and put on the bench. I had nothing else to do, just sitting there watching my teammates play the game I wanted to be in, so I started praying. At first I prayed for my team and that we would win, that kind of thing. But I began to feel like God was really listening to my prayer and that he was right there with me. I knew then my life needed to be lived according to a higher purpose and asked Him to reside in my heart. In contrast to how I was raised, I finally understood that good people don’t go to heaven, forgiven people do.